The North Bend Theatre was near capacity and fans were patiently waiting for Julee Cruise to take the stage during the 2016 Twin Peaks Festival, a former yearly celebration of Twin Peaks in and around North Bend, Washington held between 1993-2018. But something was amiss. Julee Cruise was scheduled to perform at 8:30 p.m. between several short films, Mädchen Amick’s daughter’s music video, and before a screening of Mulholland Drive. It was now 9:15 and whispers were starting to circulate that she wasn’t going to make it.
As part of Julee in June on Twin Peaks Blog, we (Mary Hütter and Anita Rehn), Julee’s appointed “Girl Gang,” are remembering her final performance in North Bend. It was a memorable night filled with love for the original voice of love.
REMEMBERING JULEE CRUISE
Julee Cruise passed away on June 9, 2022. Julee was the voice of Twin Peaks, as much a character as Dale Cooper, Laura Palmer, or the town itself. Her relationship to Twin Peaks was complicated, though. Despite being a trained, professional musician who sang and acted in New York, the voice she sang in – ethereal falsetto – was physically difficult for her. Her singing voice was (according to legend) directed by David Lynch to sound like she “was on the edge of orgasm.”
After collaborating with Lynch and Angelo Badalamenti on the song “Mysteries of Love” for the Blue Velvet motion picture soundtrack, the two men wrote and produced Julee’s first hugely successful album, “Floating into the Night.”
Julee sought more control and wanted to write on her second album, “The Voice of Love.” She was given only one song, ‘In My Other World,’ which she co-wrote with Louis Tucci. The creation was contentious, the album didn’t do well, and the trio wouldn’t work together again.
In 2002, Julee collaborated with J.J. McGeehan on “The Art of Being a Girl.” This time, she wrote and composed all the tracks and served as the album’s executive producer. This was finally the real Julee Cruise.
EVERY HOUR HOLDS THE PROMISE OF AN INVITATION TO JULEE
The real Julee Cruise was only performing at the 2016 Twin Peaks Festival thanks to Anita Rehn, whom Julee had befriended years earlier on Facebook. Anita posted a silly selfie in hot rollers which Julee thought was hysterical. She messaged Anita.
“We chatted into the night,” Anita explained. “Since we were talking online, it was easy to forget I was conversing with Julee Cruise: the artist who sings the sound my heart makes, a ‘Twin Peaks’ icon. Our friendship evolved, continued for years, and we talked about absolutely everything. I began to know her, not only as ‘Julee Cruise,’ but my friend, in all her complexity. Julee was a gifted and sensitive artist, and she spent her entire career dealing with others she felt did not respect her. Despite that, she celebrated life with abandon, sometimes leaving me voice messages of her laughing – just laughing!”
Julee had a tremendous capacity for openness and love, but this left her vulnerable to emotional pain. She was generous to a fault, shockingly unpredictable, and funny as hell.
Julee knew she was extremely talented, but also had crippling anxiety, self-doubt, and stage fright. She took great pride in the world of Twin Peaks and David Lynch, but also had a complicated and often painful relationship with both.
JULEE CRUISE APPOINTS HER GIRL GANG
After being approached by the U.S. Festival, Julee agreed to attend but only if Anita was there by her side. Julee said she always needed a “Girl Gang” in her life to help her stand up to the men who tried to keep her down or control her.
During that festival, she appointed Anita and me as her Girl Gang (complete with hand signal). She asked for specific support in dealing with the festival organizer because she didn’t feel he had her best interest at heart. She often felt, for various reasons, that she did not get the respect she deserved.
This proved true as her soundcheck was muddled by a lack of attention. An unpaid performer, Julee was surprised at the extent she had to her oversee her own background music and help direct the sound alongside John Neff. Despite the setbacks, rehearsal was flawless, and brought Anita, alone in the audience, to tears.
“I had the outrageous good fortune to have worked with her on the set list earlier in the day and sat at the theater in the seats, by myself, and listened to soundcheck,” recalled Anita. Julee Cruise IN ‘Twin Peaks’ singing to ME! I still can’t believe that actually happened! Because of that magical soundcheck that took longer than we anticipated, but because of that moving soundcheck, I knew everyone had to have it he opportunity to experience her performance. For more than a little while, I wasn’t sure it was going to happen. Thankfully, it did.”
“GET AHOLD OF ANITA! JULEE IS LATE!”
The night of Julee’s scheduled performance at the North Bend Theatre, a festival staff member approached me in a panic – “Get ahold of Anita! Julee is late!”
People within earshot audibly gasped and exchanged worried looks. I quickly followed outside, where the festival organizer was clearly upset.
“Mary! Fucking get Julee Cruise here!,” he yelled. “Tell Anita we’re starting ‘Mulholland Drive’ if they’re not here in five minutes!”
Julee and Anita were running late though! As they exited the back of the theatre after rehearsal, the audience was already lining up at the front door. They would have just enough time at the hotel for a quick wardrobe change.
Waiting for Julee in the hotel lobby was a fellow musician who’d recently been collaborating with her, his girlfriend, and their Labrador Retriever. A huge fan of both dogs and talented, attractive men, she invited them in to visit despite the need for a fast turnaround. Instead of getting ready, Julee fawned over the dog and made her guests comfortable.
As time slipped by, Anita started to panic.
She sent a text to the festival staff, “Can you move Julee back in the schedule? She’s going to be late.” Julee was stalling. She’d started getting changed but couldn’t stop playing with the dog.
Finally, Anita appealed to the musician to “Please consider getting the hell out and come back after the performance?” (It came out much more polite.)
“Oh, sure,” he said, “Julee, we’re going to head over to the theatre. We’ll see you there. Good luck.”
Off they went, leaving their dog in Julee’s room.
When it was finally just the two of them (and the Lab), instead of getting ready, Julee started ranting (again) about how disrespected she felt by the organizer and how she should just leave Washington and not perform at all.
It suddenly became clear there was another reason for these delays. Julee was afraid. Now that they were alone, it was obvious. Anita reminded her how much the waiting fans adored her, and how much they were looking forward to seeing her perform. She explained just how much she meant to them.
Eventually, Julee, now calm, picked up her make-up bag, and while digging through it said with alarm in her raspy voice, “I need red lipstick. I think I left my lipstick at home!”
Immediately Anita rebutted, “I have the perfect lipstick.” It was a bright, Twin Peaks red: MAC Cosmetics, Ruby Woo. Anita watched as Julee put it on.
She turned to Anita, smiled that huge smile, and said, “This is fucking perfect!”
“I know,” Anita said smiling. “You can keep it.”
“IS JULEE COMING?”
In the theatre parking lot, I pleaded with the organizer, “[Anita] said they’re on their way and to NOT play the movie.”
He angrily threw up his hands and yelled, “We can’t fucking wait any longer! Julee’s not here and I don’t give a fuck anyway! Julee is a ‘Diva’ and I’m not dealing with her anymore! We’re playing it!”
I tried calling Anita. No answer. Hopefully they were on their way. Walking back into the theatre, I heard murmurs from the gathered crowd, “Is Julee coming?”
“Yes, she’s coming!” Mary said defiantly to anyone who could hear. The theatre darkened and the opening scene of Mulholland Drive lit the room. Immediately, you could hear people gathering their things in the dark and exiting in droves. It was heartbreaking, because over 90% of the attendees had never seen Julee perform.
Fifteen minutes later, Anita and Julee pulled up to the historic theatre. Meeting festival staff on the way in, Anita took control and told them to stop the film. Julee Cruise would be performing.
“Remember, I’ll be watching for you on the big screen,” Irene says to Betty in Mulholland Drive. “Okay, Irene. Won’t that be the day?!”
And the theatre went black.
After a confusing moment in the dark, the stage lit up! Julee Cruise, in flowing black chiffon, looking like a million bucks, appeared on stage!
The entire theatre erupted in applause and a standing ovation. You could feel the outpouring of love from the fans, and she hadn’t yet sung a note. The sheer joy, relief, and appreciation on her face was obvious. This meant as much to her as it did to them, probably more.
JULEE CRUISE’S FINAL PERFORMANCE AT THE NORTH BEND THEATRE
As she started singing, Julee sounded different than during rehearsal. Her beautiful voice was emotional and nervous. However, with every note, she was enveloped by the love of the audience. She became a powerhouse.
Photos of Julee Cruise performing at North Bend Theatre by Travis Black
When she sang ‘The World Spins’ for Catherine Coulson who’d passed away in 2015, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
Photos of Julee Cruise performing at North Bend Theatre by Blue LoLan
After her last song, ‘Falling,’ she received another standing ovation. There are no words to capture the overwhelming and palpable adoration in that emotional moment. It felt like an incredible dream.
I think this will always be my all-time favorite performance by any artist I have seen. I’m so grateful that we were there to witness it.
– Connie Woods, the “New Girl” in “Twin Peaks”
After the performance, Julee was elated, truly floating. She could not stop talking about how wonderful the audience was and how loved she felt.
She returned to her room, and her friends came back to continue their visit. Their Lab was sleeping peacefully, exactly where they left her.
No one knew then that this would be Julee’s last full performance. Much like Julee herself, it was perfect in its uncompromising passion and complexity; a fitting final performance for her fans, and for her.
Julee spoke about that evening many times in the years following, always saying, “That was the best audience of my life!”
NICE DAY FOR A PICNIC
“I had kind of assumed that she wasn’t going to attend the picnic the next day,” recalled Anita. “She did not attend the celebrity dinner that was held the night before the performance, and she had said, more than once, that she probably wouldn’t go to the picnic. I called her anyway that morning and asked her. She responded with, ‘Of course I want to go! I can’t wait to see everyone again!’”
The 2016 festival was the first year the organizers allowed celebrity guests to charge for autographs and pictures, and they could extend that opportunity to the picnic. I was told I could give Julee the option of charging for her autograph and picture.
“Fuck no,” she firmly responded.
The magic from the night before would be very hard to beat, but watching her interact with fans at the picnic comes pretty damn close. She spent so much time with everyone, signing things, and taking picture, after picture, after picture.
“Julee kept the line stationary and walked up to each fan on Sunday,” said long-time Twin Peaks fan Dwaine Wheeler. “She did not just sit at a table and have the fans come to her. I’ve never seen that happen before or after. I miss her.”
She hugged so many people and had some very moving conversations. It was incredible! I don’t think that would have happened if that audience at the theater had not demonstrated to her how much she meant to all of us. I felt like she wanted to go to the picnic to let everyone know how much they meant to her. She talked about that weekend for months and months after.
It makes my heart feel so full that her vulnerability was rewarded with so much love and devotion.
CELEBRATING JULEE CRUISE
Julee died like she lived – on her own terms. After a more than 30-year painful battle with Lupus, she let herself pass while listening to the song “Roam” by the B-52s, a band she enjoyed performing with for years, with her beloved husband Ed Grinnan, by her side.
She left us with all she had to give, and she took part of all of us with her.
Julee Cruise celebrated music, art, love, and life. She was fiercely supportive of her friends and family and was always a champion for fellow women artists. She knew too well the challenges faced and battles fought.
This was one of the many reasons she took her Girl Gangs seriously and expected the same from us. We’ll always have her music in our hearts and the memory of that extraordinary performance in the trees. Her legend lives on.
We love you, Julee. Girl Gang Forever.
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